Rahasia di Balik Nama Domain yang Sukses—Sudah Tahu Belum?

As soon as Gran unlocked her front door, I eagerly rushed to greet her.

But just as I approached, she strongly shoved me back.

I was ten years old and visiting her during theschoolvacations, together with my older brother and mother.

She embraced my brother warmly and spoke to him with affection. In the meantime, I remainedgetting told offfor things that I didn't understand

To this day, I remain unaware of why she believed I was worthy of that – and such situations have consistently occurred ever since.

My maternal grandmotherHas never sent me a heartfelt message in a Christmas or birthday card, shared amusing tales from her youth, or shown any concern for my well-being. In fact, she has been openly unfriendly.

By the time I started university, she would make negative comments such as, "you'll never have a job" or "you'll just rely on government support."

This is even though I willingly cut Gran's lawn, washed her car, painted her fences, and offered assistance wherever I could while balancing my studies.

Her statements caused pain and ignited my anger. I longed to respond, but my mother would shake her head, as if signaling, 'don't.' I felt constrained and had to suppress my emotions.

Once, around the same time, I spent the night and – out of nowhere – she told me I was 'emotionally dense', that I would never achieve anything andI’ll die alone.  

I was completely shocked by what I overheard. I couldn't find the words to say. I was amazed that my mother remained silent.

While attending university, I made a point to steer clear of Gran whenever possible. However, at my graduation in the mid-2010s, she showed up at the event along with my parents and brother, despite my wish for her not to be there.

When the rest of the family left the table for a moment, she told me that I would probably be at the unemployment office the next week.

Three years spent at university, combined with dedicated effort, a semester studying overseas, and volunteering during my spare time—ranging from tutoring English on my own to gaining retail skills by working in charity shops. None of these efforts appeared to hold any significance for her. I felt completely dismissed.

I calmly stated that this was not the situation, as I had received a scholarship for an intensive language program in Germany and had a job arranged afterward. Gran simply frowned and quickly looked away when my brother and parents came back, as if trying to conceal what had just occurred.

Even after I relocated to Germany, her unpleasant behavior persisted, and she circulated a strange and baseless rumor about me.was a neo-Nazi. 

Once more, I didn't address her. I was discouraged from speaking up by other family members who said it wouldn't have any impact.

I spent several years living and working in Germany before returning to the UK and securing a position within the NHS. However, when I called Mum to share my exciting news, Gran was in the background and I overheard her say: 'That sounds like a lot of responsibility for someone like you.'

Luckily, Mom supported me in this situation, but I ended the call and felt very sad that another positive moment had been ruined.

The impact on her body and mind has been significant. I've put on a lot of weight and now have high blood pressure, low self-confidence, and recently had to take a break from work. due to depression. 

My job organized therapy appointments, and Gran's attitude toward me was a main point of discussion. I explained to the therapist that I think this has caused me to feel like I don't belong in our family and always have to prove or explain everything I do.

I sense like I don't belong and am lost. The therapist could only guess that there was serious harm and it would require more than our meetings to start any form of recovery.or self-care.  

To this day, I have never been able to understand why Gran dislikes me or behaves toward me in that manner.

Every time I've shared with my mom, dad, and brother my desire to face Gran, I'm discouraged and informed that I'll never receive a response.

Therefore, I have given up any hope of a successful clash.

Tragically, I discovered that her hostility began before I was born, as it came to light that she had even recommended my parents terminate the pregnancy.